Details: Russell Brand was the best man at your wedding this summer. What was his toast like?
Noel Gallagher: If you weren't me, it was fucking sidesplitting. He just listed all the ludicrous, daft shit I've said and done over the past years. He basically said, "How is this idiot ending up with that woman? If he wasn't a fucking rock star, she wouldn't have looked twice at him." My wife said, "Well, that makes me look shallow, doesn't it?" To which I said, "Well, it's fucking true. You know it and I know it." He was my best man—there's no better man than him. If you see my friends, no one's the best. They're all barely acceptable. I couldn't have them make the speech when I have the modern-day Shakespeare here, who can speak for nine hours on nothing. It was the first time I've ever seen him speak when he didn't talk about himself. It killed him to talk about me.
Matt: If I ever heard that piece of Bach music in the world, it's going to make me shudder
Russell: Really? If you went to a concert and Bach's playing..
Matt: And suddenly it's Russell's ringtone I heard..(Russell hums the tune and giggles)..nervously..
Russell: The next thing you'll hear (shouts) WHERE'S MY TAXI, WHAT'S GOING ON, OH CHRIST THESE JEANS AREN'T TIGHT ENOUGH, OH CHRIST I USED TO BE A DRUG ADDICT, LOOK AFTER ME, I FANCY HER, I THINK I'M GOING TO BE SICK, GET ME SOME WHEAT FREE FOOD